_________ December 11, 2015 __________

Jinxing Myself

That’s what I get for tootin’ my own horn about blessings and happiness and all that good stuff.  You know the moment I write about something, a jinx is set off, and something’s gonna happen.  Next time, I’ll be forewarned.  Because everything in the ENTIRE world has gone to pot, and all I want to do is find the nearest, thickest blanket and go hide for the duration.  With chocolate.  I hate it all.  It’s horrific.  Everything is just… can’t… even.

My camera died.  Last night.  Not ONE picture from the recital turned out.  The shutter speed was non-existent, everything was a mass of blur, and I am absolutely DEVASTATED by this.  It’s not like I can go back and do it again.  It was a one. time. thing.  And while Brian got a mostly acceptable video of her dance, I’m just… it just… I… aw, fudge!!!  And the sucky thing is that I knew that it was having problems.  The dadgum thing is something like eleven years old.  More like eighty-four in my hands – I take that baby up dune and down cavern and through forest and around state.  I put the HURT to that thing, and I knew that it was having trouble, but…!!!  I’m just so upset.

And it probably wouldn’t be *THIS* bad, but Aunt Flo knocked on my door just as I was gussying up for the recital, and that’s ALWAYS fun, to have her to contend with, on top of everything.

And no, there are no pictures at the studio’s FB page.  Maybe (if I pray really hard) in a few days, but there aren’t any there from past recitals, so I’m not holding my breath.  I’ve even stalked up every person who ever left a review, there, looking for pictures.  Nothing.  Just one horribly blurry/jumpy video of a dance that rather sucked.  So I may just be screwed.

Brian got the only viable video – I can send it along, and you can at least see her dance.  She was just beautiful – it was the first time she’s ever danced with her hair down loose.  It was absolutely breathtaking.  And I’m TRYING to retrieve snapshots from the video, but he didn’t really zoom in close enough for detail.  I don’t know if it’s even gonna work.  (*sobs*)  You don’t know me and my pictures.  Well… maybe you’ve gotten a small inkling, but…   !!!!!!!!!!

And my heel broke on my boots.  Three inch heels, and the cap got lost, somewhere… don’t even know.  But I’m going ‘tap-CLIP, tap-CLIP’ as I walk, and so what does my guy do?  He snaps off the other cap!  Great, so now BOTH of my boots are broken!  He’s supposedly going to fill them in with epoxy and sand them flat.  He was also supposedly going to fix this metal tree that I had that was broken… it rode around in his truck for THREE YEARS before he pulled it out and brought it into work to use the machine on.  The lamp that’s broke that he was going to fix has been sitting on our dresser for FIVE YEARS – I’m not even sure where the base is, anymore.  I’m thinking my boot’s heels are SO screwed…!

I woke up to find out that the really crappy anti-virus we bought last year just auto-renewed on us.  Happy X-mess, g’bye $100.  I’m NOT happy.  I’ve dealt with customer service and had them turn off the auto-renew (there’s not a place to do that at their site or on ‘my account’, wink-wink.).  But of COURSE they’re not going to refund it, since I had agreed to terms and services.  Rat bastards.  That’s just scummy, y’know that?!  When this year is up?  They are SO history, that’s all I’m sayin’.

I’m probably testy because tonight is Shabbat, and Lydia and I have to be gone, so we can’t have the Shabbat meal.  Tonight is BFF’s girl’s dance recital (things are broken down into three nights, you see.  Lydia’s dance was in last night’s recital, all of her’s are in tonight’s.  There was also a recital Wednesday.  Anyhow, I’m bringing the little point-n-snap (that’s in my purse as back-up) to take pictures, tonight, but… too little, too late.  Any it’s gonna trump Shabbat, which makes me testy.  And it’s not like we can alternatively have Shabbat tomorrow for lunch, instead – oh, no.  We’ve got an appointment, then, and will be out.   ARRRGH!!!!  Can *anything* go right?!?!?


Brian called at noon, calmed me down.  Said I’m not one to sit around and mourn a camera.  Said we need a new one, and to do what we need to do.  And he’s right – I had a job to do.  Everything got SO much better/more interesting from there.  I came back here to fix this mess of a vent, but as I sat down to finish this thing up, I got an e-mail:

Cal was taken into emergency early this week with a massive heart attack.  He did not regain consciousness.  He passed away on Tuesday morning.  Please know Cal really enjoyed your chats.  He did not tell you he had been sick for several years and that it was just a manner of time.  We had Cal cremated yesterday and I will probably take him to GLNC for internment sometime next year.  Again, thank you for being there for him in his last days.
– Sondra  AKA:  wifey

I have to go.

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